Moving Day

How do I even begin to express my sadness of leaving my host family?

The funny thing is I'll see them, I'll see them around town, I'll stop by the house, I'll be here. 

I've left many a host family in tears. Nepal was hard to leave because of Shila and Jenica, and Tommy the dog, and all the rest. I cried tears with Angelita in Spain as she dropped me off at the bus with my things, and saying goodbye to Angela and Irene was no small emotional task. Goodbyes to Mamá and Lituania in Mexico seem oh so long ago. Leaving my host family in Morocco was riddled with wishes for more time together. And now, after only one month in their home, Evelia, Alexander, Alexandra, Janis, and Tiago are my family. And I guess Bobo too, despite his constant fleas. 

I will miss so much dinner conversations and holding Tiago and watching him grow day by day, I will miss bedtime movies with Janis. I can't even express how much these small daily activities have meant to me. I will miss having food prepared for me and pots and pans cleaned at my expense. I will definitely miss laughing so hard, and Peruvian TV for sure, especially the red versus green show, and la Esposa Jóven, the Turkish soap opera. I'll miss the morning Cuentame Todo celebrity gossip. I'll miss getting the latest political updates and interpretations. I will miss the mazamora that I'm not sure I'll ever prepare for myself. I'll miss my big bed. I'll miss the company, and the care, and the love. That's what I'll miss most. The love. The feeling and joy of family. But they're here, they're right near the office always, and I need to remember that. 

I'm not going to say it didn't come with its challenges, fleas, chiggers, chicken soup, seemingly endless amounts of white rice... but I'd do it all again if it meant I got to meet and love this family. I'm honored really. 

I'll miss them so much I really will. Being taken care of is such a luxury. But being on my own is going to feel so good, I just hope it doesn't get too lonely. 

I've never left a host family for just another part of town. I've never had host parents help me figure out how to get my balon de gas for my kitchen. I've been invited back like family to many places but not just to stop by. It's such an odd dynamic to be leaving a family and an experience that I've loved just to live alone. In fact, I've never lived alone. I've shared a home with more people than I can even count, but I've never been alone. 

I used to say years and years ago how I wanted to live alone one day, have my own place and fix it up just the way I want it. I grew up and realized as fun as it might be it might also be rather lonely. 

But here's the thing, I rejuvenate when I'm alone, I'm one of those people. Yeah. So while I'll miss having this family so near by and though things may seem oh so quiet at first, I really do think this is the best long term option for me. I need to be able to obsessively clean my bathroom and kitchen, and align everything on tables just the way I like it. It keeps me sane to have just that little bit of control over my life. And for that I'm excited. 

I'm excited to finally, almost two months later, unpack. Fully unpack. Put my clothes in a closet and my books on a table. I'm excited for that. So excited. 

Change is coming in town and at work as tourist and volunteers depart and the winter season begins to dwindle here in Peru. It will mean so many adjustments in addition to all of the fresh work load I'm taking on. Navigating so many changes all at once has been exhausting, and I'm eager for things to settle down. Yet work seems like it will only keep picking up speed until a hopefully calm period to start after the holiday season. But I'm ready, I'm ready to be busy and to work hard, and to face all of the little challenges and make them into mini victories. 

I'll say my "see ya laters" to my new family and reserve goodbyes for long down the road. I'll adventure out on my own and try to remember what it's like to live independently and be responsible for feeding myself. I'll try and I guess that's more than enough for now. Trying. 

Changes are coming, but I'm ready. 

Now to figure out a strategy for carting 19 months worth of belongings across cobblestone streets, wooden bridges, dirt roads and multiple sets of stairs... Hmmm. Well it's moving day!